After doing this online learning and other operations for two weeks and going into the third, I've learned some new things about myself--like the fact that I'm most concerned about my education during this time, and that I want to do everything I can to ensure that I am taking on more and more technical projects to add to my portfolio despite the fact that it seems more and more likely that I will not be able to partake in an internship this summer. While disappointing, I have been determined to refine my skills and make sure I have some experience to show when I start applying for internships on August. After a while of just having tunnel vision on my academics and surviving the last few weeks, I've come up with some new projects to develop and add to my portfolio that I am excited about.
In terms of school, I've been really focused on finishing as strong as I possibly can. Some of the major challenges I have faced include keeping my focus in my childhood home, and connecting with my fellow students and my TAs and professors to maintain communication about my work and make sure that I'm staying on track. It's been possible but difficult. The only thing is I don't really love having assigned partners for things remotely for classes that they are taking S/U while I'm doing it for a grade because the mismatch in effort and ability to contribute isn't working for me personally (nothing against them). However, it's adjustment to manage I suppose.
I've also been keeping up Technical Operations at WVBR 93.5 FM, and while that has also been tricky, I'm looking forward to planning new innovations and and to collaboratively make necessary updates to push the station forward.
But most of all, I've been trying to keep it together. In these times, it's easy to feel isolated and overwhelmed, or even underwhelmed and feeling helpless. I have my moments of feeling both, and this is coming from a place of being privileged in that I have somewhere reliable, safe and comfortable to socially distance. Through "keeping it together," I've realized that it's okay to not always keep it together. I'm trying to give myself permission to not be okay all the time, and just feel how I feel about certain things. It may create some dissent and conflict, but that's not a bad thing.